Stinkin' Strike

Wow, you ladies go to long lengths to get groomed during your pregnancy. I am impressed. You know I think we groom more for our doctor's then our husbands, but whatever the motivation, our men have it made.

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Let's talk about the writers strike, shall we? It is all over the news and as disturbing as it is for me not to have my new shows on, what is more disturbing to me is the footage of these striking writers. No, I am not talking about Jay Leno bringing them bagels. (bagels? Jay, you are worth billions of dollars, hows about a full catered breakfast?)
Have you heard them chanting on the picket line?

"Hey, hey! Ho, ho! Management can’t write the show!"

"Webisodes and DVD, we won’t write ‘em, not for free!"
and my personal fav:

"We write the storyas for Eva Longoria"

Storyas??? These are writers? They can't come up with anything better?
This cannot bode well for them. No wonder Grey's Anatomy sucks this year.

Also? If Lost doesn't come back with all new episodes in February after me waiting forever, the writers are going to have more to worry about then getting paid for webisodes.

I'm just sayin'.

That is What They Mean by "Bad Times"

I know I shouldn't be so hard on myself.
I knew it was just a matter of time.
It can't be helped, it happens to the best of us.
I just didn't know it could happen to me........so soon.

It is OK to admit it, I know I am not alone. I know you, the blogging community, will support me.
People, my belly is now so big that I cannot :ahem: groom properly.
Ladies you know what I am talking about. I am not the agile woman of yesteryear and combine that with me being bigger this second pregnancy and you have yourself a potent cocktail.
Indeed.

My usual grooming habits have fallen wayside and I have now resorted to doing a blind shave in the shower. Yes, it is risky and I know it is not long before I have to give this up too. This time around I am going to have to ask for help sooner. I am going to have to send in reinforcements.
I have to get E to help me.

I felt bad about this last time around, I felt like I was making him do this heinous act. This time around, I feel like it is his duty.
It is the least he could do.
If I have to squeeze a large object out of a small hole then he can at least make it look pretty.

Can I get an amen?

Grooming for My Doctor? Why Do I Care?

I didn't get the message from God to build an Arc.
I am so sick of this rain.

Today I can't talk about how shitty this world is, or how the 5 days of rain and winds are driving me insane.


No, I am warning you, today I am going to talk about pubic hair.
Get out now while you can. Just click that little red x in the upper right hand corner.

OK, well here we go. I cannot bring myself to get a Brazilian wax. I just can't get on all fours in front of anyone, never mind someone ripping hairs from my innermost sensitive places. At least not without a promised orgasm.
I have been the recipient of a regular old bikini wax. It is fine, it hurts but what doesn't?
So, I have taken to shaving.
Everything.
It is a menacing task which requires you to contort your body into positions not easily achieved and various tools. AND unless you like stubble you have to do it often. It is a bitch but I do it.

Which brings me to my problem. I have a gyn appointment next week and I am too embarrassed to show up hairless.
I have no idea why, I mean it is common nowadays and really, who cares what my doctor thinks of my grooming practices. After all it takes quite a while so why not show it off?!
I guess I will let some grow in so as not to be so embarrassed. really what I should do is write the words " I know, I know, scoot down more" for my doctor but alas, I am not that hairy.