Monday, December 31, 2007

New Year/New Me

I am happy 2007 is over it wasn't that great anyway!
yes, we made a human being that is still cooking away but besides that? Nothing that terrific happened.

Here is to hoping that in 2008:

-I deliver a healthy baby. (being one of those women who simply wince at the labor pains, get to the hospital and deliver within 30 minutes would be a huge bonus!)

-E gets a new job that he loves. Minus the bitchy, jealous boss and more money would be terrific.

-I wean myself off all of my asthma and allergy medications.

-I have enough money to bring the kids to my homeopath so they can get the right detox for all the stupid, ridiculous, money making vaccines the state of NJ say they need, but I don't want to give them, to start kindergarten.

-That I make at least one friend in this stupid town.

-That my kids transition well to a new baby being in our home.

-That I eat healthier and go to the gym more.

-That you guys are still around to hear what stupid things I have to say about my life on a daily basis! I hope you guys all have a great 2008.

Friday, December 28, 2007


Christmas is over. Now I do what every person does after Christmas, put together toys, listen to kids beg to open this or that, eat gross amounts of leftovers, clean and wallow in depression.
What? You don't get depressed after the holidays are over? You are strange.

I always get a little depressed after the holidays, back to the daily boredom, no more holiday magic, wishing I hadn't eaten that much and knowing I have to pack all this holiday crap up, gets to me. Add to that my husband still hasn't had any job offers, I assume because of the holidays, and it is more then my little pregnant head can handle. I am worried about everything. Bills, insurance, the cost of my perscriptions, my doctor's appointments, the list goes on and on. Not great for someone who is pregnant.

My kids had an amazing Christmas. They received so many lovely gifts and some I even love. Amazingly only one is loud enough that I want to smash it into a million pieces.
That itself is my Christmas miracle!

Wednesday, December 26, 2007

Hope Yours Was Great Too!

After being awake and moving for 19 hours yesterday, I am finally so tired. I made it, the kids had an amazing Christmas, I ate waaaaay too much and I fear for my gestational diabetes test I have to take this week.
We had a great time with family and friends and I will provide more details when I finally get some rest!

Sunday, December 23, 2007

Merry Christmas

Today I am baking like a mad woman, orange cranberry mini muffins, chocolate chip cookies, brownies, peanut butter kiss cookies, peanut butter balls rolled in coconut. I bake cookies every year for my neighbors and since I am crazy and slightly nesting this worked out well for me this year. I just have to resist eating them all!

Tomorrow morning I have to blanch and peel boiler onions for Tuesday and make a pumpkin cheesecake. Then we are off to our hometown* for church and our annual party at one of my Aunt's house. We will try not to stay too late because we have a long drive home, have to put gifts under the tree and get some sleep before my son, the rooster, wakes us up at the crack of dawn.
Christmas will be spent with family a fire and good food.
Nothing is better.

Have a great Christmas everyone. Keep yourselves safe and I hope you get everything you never knew you wanted this year.
Loves, Tuesday Girl

*before church I am going to my favorite pizza place/restaurant to get a meatball Parmesan hero and eat it in the car before church. Then I will get a second one for another day. This is my newsest pregnancy craving and any family member that ventures to my home must bring me one to gain entry into my house.

Thursday, December 20, 2007


I have one small gift left to buy for my mother. I knew what I needed, packed up my coupon for the store and headed out. This particular store was farther away then I would like to travel these days but for my Mom, I made the trek. When I got in the store, I circled it a few times looking for my item or someone who could help me. Neither were easy to find. When I finally found someone they told me the item I wanted was never sold it in that store. I had mistaken this store for the store where E & I both worked as managers, and met.
The store which broke us of our spirits and made us cry before we had to go to work each day.
Lets call this store, bloodbath & beyond.

So I went to bloodbath & beyond which is right by my house but is a place I never frequent because, well, the store itself almost killed me.
I called on the way to make sure what I wanted they had in stock. Some rude old lady told me they did, but when I go there I couldn't find it. Of course the only salesperson I found was the one I had already spoken to on the phone, she pointed out what she thought I was looking for.
It wasn't it.
Of course, I wanted to kick this lady in the vagina because making a pregnant woman go from store to store and find parking and actually lap these stores looking for something that apparently bloodbath & beyond likes to dangle in front of you in its stupid catalog but is sold out of it, is just crazy. (Of course I am partly to blame in this situation, but I am pregnant and tired and cranky, therefore everyone know that the blame is to be placed on someone else.)

I asked myself "what would baby Jesus do?" and since it is his birthday we are celebrating with gifts and such, no vagina kicking is allowed.
But! On Lincoln's birthday watch out, because if one person makes a false move, I am kicking something!

Wednesday, December 19, 2007

Perhaps She Can Call Dr. Phil?

Wow, lots of people hate Walmart. Then why is it the biggest retailer in the U.S.? I did notice Walmart had fabu prices on pantry items, but since mine is small and doesn't have a full grocery section I never go there.

Am I the only one who laughed when they found out Jamie Lynn Spears, who is 16, is pregnant? I don't mean to be cruel, but c'mon, who raised these girls? After Britney flailed and is still flailing wouldn't you take the youngest daughter, quit show biz and Fly your asses home to Louisiana? I love it that mama Spears is writing a parenting book, which understandably has been put "on hold". What gives her any authority to write a book about anything?

I just love how Britney was the poster child for a such a "good girl" as a teen and how she was a virgin. She broke up with one good guy and her whole world has been a hot mess ever since. That girl is just a hot mess.
If you are reading this mama Spears, my advice to you is circle the wagons, my friend. Gather ALL of your family together, out of the spotlight and circle the wagons.

Tuesday, December 18, 2007

Target So Kicks Walmart's Ass

I do not ever go to Walmart. So when the events of last week lead me to that store not once but twice, I got to recall why my ban on Walmart exists.
What is that place anyway? It is filled with people and situations I never see in real life, while I am out and about.

I had to buy something for a gift and I had seen online that Walmart had it the cheapest and they had it in stock, big bonus. So I headed there and had a relatively easy experience. Yesterday I had to go back to return it because my sister found the same item I bought $10 cheaper. So I went to return it.

The customer service desk was located right near the front door so I entered and got on the long ass line. I was then yelled at by a young lady in a wheelchair who was pissed at me that I didn't see her with my return when I walked in the door. Was I supposed to know this rule?
I had not and I didn't even see her when I walked in. I apologized for my lack of Walmart knowledge and crisis was averted.

The aisles are crowded, there seems to be an abnormal amount of people who cannot walk unassisted and there are no prices on the shelves.
I picked up the last ponyville teapot castle for my daughter, and couldn't find a price, (surprise!) I had checked online earlier, and had seen that it was at least $10 cheaper then anywhere else. So, I brought it up to the register and it rang up regular price. I told the woman that I saw it online for a different price and asked if they didn't have the same prices online as in the store or would they match the online price I saw. She mumbled something about online to store deals but clearly had no idea of what I was asking.

I left the stupid toy there.

Seriously what is up with this store? Are all Walmarts created equally as bad?
I love my Tarjay and promise to never cheat on it with it's redneck cousin Walmart ever again!

Monday, December 17, 2007


Things that gross me out about being a mother #43589:
I found a nail clipping from one of my kids in my hair last night.
I had clipped their nails hours before that.

So gross.

Sunday, December 16, 2007

New Digs!

A HUGE shout out to Ro from The Blog Cafe. She did my old template and fitted me with this new one when my old sidebard went buggy for no reason.
They have premade templates and will work with you on custom orders too. Ro is fast, amazing and didn't kill me when I stalked her aboutmy blog problem.

Thank you Ro!

Friday, December 14, 2007

Questions Unanswered

My head is spinning with worries, holiday stuff left undone, strange cravings that go as fast as they came and pregnancy brain. I have so many questions that I can't answer. Maybe you can.

Do people really think Michael Vick got too harsh or a punishment?

Why do all of my maternity tops have 3/4 sleeves? Really, all of them!

Even though it can be such a great place to live, why does NJ suck so very much sometimes?

Why would my sister own any maternity shirts with horizontal stripes?

Can my ass spread that fast? Can I blame the wide ass on these pants?

How can my daughter only be four but acts like she is fourteen? I am in real trouble when she actually becomes a teenager! I am planning my escape now.

Why would my adorable blog just get all funky on me for no reason one day? I miss you sidebar! I am sorry I cannot fix you myself.

Thursday, December 13, 2007

Consumerism at it's Best

I think I need to go back to my all TV is banned rule because my four year old daughter asked for a High School Musical DVD for Christmas this morning.

Where did she get that from? And, no, she is not getting it.

Wednesday, December 12, 2007

The Days Run Into Each Other

Our house is officially decorated for Christmas. The garland is hung, the tree was purchased and decorated, the cookie jars are placed just so.
I am not sure why, but I decorated half heartedly this year, I just wasn't into it. Well, I can guess why.
I have kids who are very into it though and so I did it for them.

Having E home every day was nice for the first 10 days. Now? Not so much. He is bored and depressed, I am bored and depressed but I am trying to fake it for the family. If I let these recent setbacks affect me then the whole family will be in the dumps. I need to keep my mood up for E and for the baby. I hope all this worrying, stress and holiday madness does not transfer to this baby. I don't want to go into premature labor and I really want a healthy child.

How is that for a cheery Christmas update?

Monday, December 10, 2007

Lunchbox Treats

This weekend I found myself at Walmart, which is an oddity since I rarely ever enter that store. I wasn't feeling good and I wanted something to eat, the sugary, the better. I stumbled on Hostess pies! I hadn't seen them in years. It brought me right back to being in elementary school. Sometimes those pies would find its way into my lunch box as a kid.
Those were good days. Cherry was my favorite followed by lemon and apple was my sister's favorite.

Then I started thinking about all my favorite treats my mom would send for us for lunch. Those were long before the school lunches you can get in elementary school now. Although the lunches my mom prepared were always healthy occasionally we would get a "treat" with our healthy snack. Individual bags of doritos, ring dings (when they were individually wrapped in foil, the best) and homemade, tiny cherry cheesecakes. Sometimes I would even get a special note on my napkin from my mom.
I toted those special lunches with care in my metal lunch boxes* and then later, my much lighter Strawberry Shortcake or Muppet plastic lunchbox.

What was your favorite treats that you got for lunches? Did you carry them in lunchboxes or were you too cool for that and used a paper bag?

* A stupid boy named George hit me over the head with his even more stupid Star Wars metal lunchbox one day on the bus. I was in third grade and it was the only time I saw stars from an injury. What a dick.

Friday, December 07, 2007

Santa is the Best Parenting Tool I Have Right Now

My hair looks fabu and I am so thankful I don't have to stare at my roots and my greys on a daily basis. At least for another 8 weeks. My green salon was cool but different, I am now used to big huge hair salons and this one is small with a small staff. It reminded me of the NYC salons I would frequent when I was a DINK and had lots of money to spend on my hair.
I didn't have anything to eat, I have no idea why, I was hungry.

I went to the doctor's yesterday for my monthly visit and I was scared about how much weight I have gained in the past 5 weeks. You have to account for Thanksgiving and leftover Halloween candy, so I was really nervous for that stupid weigh in. I don't know why because I never look at the scale, I always avert my eyes. I can't handle the truth. I am a wuss.
My doctor didn't peep about it, so I feel fine. The only one who gave me a hard time was this nurse practitioner I see sometimes. She never had kids so I take her "advice" to lay off all fruit and I discard it as soon as it leaves her mouth.

My Mom is having her annual Christmas party tomorrow and Santa will be there. This is enough ammo for my kids to behave for the past week. I wish I thought of that sooner. I wonder if it will work for the 51 weeks after Christmas? I better not, when you get a new one that works like that you have to use it sparingly.
That is an FYI to all you new parents out there.
You are welcome.

Wednesday, December 05, 2007

Hair and Big Bellys

This is from my view. Feet still visible, but barely. Any day know I will be asking my kids to tie my shoes for me.
Not to self: teach children how to tie shoes.

My hair came out awesome. I have sufficient blondness to disguise my grey hairs the kids gave me. Kudos to Tara my hair girl. That now her new title: hair girl.
Also? How much do you admire me for posting this picture of myself without makeup? Really, I should win some award.
Lets hope E get s a job soon because I think botox is calling my name. Hello, forehead wrinkles!

Tuesday, December 04, 2007

Green Hairgasms

I didn't sleep at all last night due to the fact that the wind outside sounded like it was going to tear the roof off. That coupled with the sound of our Christmas lights banging against the house the entire night. E slept like a rock and I wonder how that is possible.

Today I am going to the salon to get a touch up on my highlights. I feel extremely guilty about this because I shouldn't spend the money on my stupid hair but my roots are horrible and I can't stand looking at myself for one more day. My colorist and stylist moved to a "green" salon where they don't use terrible chemicals and leave out the formaldehyde in nail polish and such. They used environmentally friendly building construction, have energy efficient lighting and every packaging is in recyclable materials. I am excited because I feel like I am doing my small part to help the world and because it doesn't look any more expensive then my former salon. I am also looking forward to the shampooing of my hair which will give me a hairgasm.
OK fine, I am mostly excited because I read they have "butlered hors d’oeuvres".

I will just make up for the guilt on spending money we don't have on eating my body weight in hors d'oeuvres.
That is going to be a lot of mini quiches!

Sunday, December 02, 2007

It Never Stops

Me: I haven't been feeling the baby move that much yet today and its making me nervous. Do something to make the baby move.

E: Sex?

Me: Your first instinct is to have sex to make the baby move?

E: Yes.

Me: You never lose that drive in any circumstance, do you?

E: Nope.

Me: I was thinking more along the lines of putting your ipod on my stomach

E: I guess that can work too.

Sometimes I think I get men and it is exchanges like these that remind me I am clueless.