The Happenings

The past two weeks have been crazy for the Tuesday Girl household. The company I blogged for went out of business, locked me out of my site, refused to let me buy my domain all in 5 minutes. I needed to lose that extra income right now like I need a hole in my head.
Good times.

So, I had to start my own blog with my very little knowledge on how to do so. I had some help, figured some things out on my own and still need some help on things I cannot figure out, but I am getting there*. Go check it out and bookmark me: www.parentingourkids.com. I have reviews, articles, tips and giveaways, actually right now I have two giveaways going on that I know you will love.

The vacation was amazing and the only thing I hated about going on it was leaving my baby. I have never been away from any of my children that long and although I had been wishing for a break for years, when it came down to it, it was a hard decision to make. Everywhere I went in Colorado I saw babies and tears would spring to my eyes. I missed him and although I knew the type of vacation isn't for a baby, I still wished he was there.


This weekend I am off to General Mills and the Betty Crocker kitchens. We will talk about meal planning and what makes life easier in the kitchen. I hope they don't mind if I sneak into a closet and stay there forever.
I think it will be so much fun seeing how they come up with new foods and give them my feedback on what I think they can do to make foods more family friendly.
If you have anything you would like me to tell General Mills while I am there, I will! Just leave your feedback/question/concerns in the comments.
Check on my other blog (www.parentingourkids.com did you bookmark it yet?) and twitter for updates and lots of pictures from this trip.

When I get back it is the first day of school for my first graders. I know they will do well at school, but how will baby K and I do without them all day long?




*anyone proficient in wordpress want to help a girl out? I need some tweaking help and will pay you in virtual kisses and ad space.

Colorado

So, Colorado.
I won this Epic Summer Vacation trip from Mom Central and it was terrific. E couldn't go because of his new job and K couldn't go because 1 year olds usually don't like being awake for 12 hours with no nap in sight.
I took the twins and asked my mom if she would like to go with us and off we went.
I did things I have never done before like hike up a mountain with an elevation of 12,500 (we didn't hike the whole mountain), rafting, rode a gondola and experienced all of this and more with my kids. They had an amazing time and I know it will be something they will remember forever.

On our rafting trip we stopped and all got out on the edge of the banks. Overhead there was a cliff that you can dive off of and a smaller 6 foot cliff for the kids. Someone asked who was going up to dive off and mentioned this once-in-a-lifetime event. I don't know what I was thinking as I climbed up the steep, dangerous cliff. I know more than one time I thought about backing out and if the cliff wasn't so steep and loose I would have.
Someone jumped off, then another person and then it was my turn. I carefully walked out onto the ledge and the guide started a count down. I was scared to death and even as I type this now, my heart is racing and my palms are sweating. How could I make myself step off of this rock and free fall?

I couldn't hear anything.
I wondered should I step off or leap. Everything was quiet as I just stepped out. The 25 foot fall was so quick but slow all at the same time. When I landed into the water all I saw was bubbles above my head. It was dark.
I popped up above water with my ahnds in the air feeling victorious.
My hands and legs were shaking for an hour after that from the adrenaline.
I couldn't believe what I had just done. My kids were cheering for me and then they each took their turn jumping off the 6 foot rock as I cheered for them.
I have never been more proud of my kids.
We took risks, met new people, had fun, laughed and enjoyed everything about this vacation.
We missed the boys back at home but had plenty of stories and pictures to share.

Now we go back to our lives already in progress.

Rocky Mountain High

The twins, my mother and I went to Colorado last week. It was amazing and more about it soon, well as soon as my ears stop popping and I can walk in a straight line again!

Just Make Sure He Is Rich

R "Mommy, I don't know who to marry!"

I am exasperated when she says this. She talks about marriage and marrying her father often in a way that is very cute and innocent. But as her mother I want to grab her by the shoulders and yell into her face "You don't need a man for anything, you can be whatever you want without a man. You can be independent. Never answer to anyone! Who needs men anyway?"

Instead I answer "you know R, you don't have to get married."

R: eyes wide as saucers " I don't?"

Me: "Nope! You can get married if you find the right man but you don't have to get married"

R: "But you wanted to get married right, Mommy?"

Me: "yes, but I found the right man"

R: "I am worried I want to marry the Jonas brothers* but other people are older than me and I don't know them yet and I know they are going to marry older people"

Me: "you don't even know the Jonas brothers, maybe they wouldn't be perfect for you like maybe they don't like to color or watch Princess movies. Maybe they don't like blond hair or to sing...wait, oh yeah.

R: "gotcha, they DO like to sing"

She got me alright.
I just never knew conversations about getting married would be so serious and would come only 6 years into parenting. ALMOST makes me wish for the death conversations involving my Dad to come back.
Almost.


* really how the heck does she know about teh Jonas brothers anyway? Stupid school!

How To Save A Life

There is a common theme to my life that seems like a positive attribute to have on the surface, but when you dig deeper, you realize it is a destructive path.
I want to save everyone.

When I was a teenager my parents got divorced and it devastated me. I mean, I could see where the path was headed, my parents fought- often. It didn't mean that it didn't come as a surprise and a terrible blow to me.
When my parents fought/argued/disagreed I would silently stick up for my father. I thought of him as the underdog, one who couldn't do what he wanted to do without being yelled at. As a married adult now, I know now that the problems were something he brought on to himself.
Marriage is hard, I get it.
When he moved out, I was nervous for him- who would wash his clothes, make sure he ate homemade meals and what would he do without us? I felt more sad for him than I did for myself.
I wanted to be the one who took care of him. Even though I was only 14 and didn't have a clue about life at all, I wanted to save him.

Fast foward a couple of years and one fucked up boyfriend later and I was in the same situation -new man. I had been dating a self-destructive guy who was sweet and loving when he wanted to be, aloof and kind of mean when he didn't.
He didn't have a supportive family actually his family was really messed up so I wanted to be the one to give him that.
The only problem was he didn't want it.


When someone really close to me did something I never thought would ever be done to me or my family my first reaction was to be livid. I wanted to physically kick the shit out of this person. The weight of my anger would come out of my fists and I would feel better.
Very surprisingly this feeling didn't last very long. It was replaced by hurt/sadness/incredulous and the feeling of wanting to help. To help the person who could not have done this in their right mind. To get through it together.

It is a recurring theme in my life.
I am not perfect, I have faults and problems and issues like everyone I tried to save. I am going to have to focus on why I want to be the saver, the heroine, the knight in shining heels.

Before I try and save anyone else, I first have to save myself.

Still Hot

I still got it.
Even after having 3 kids who did unspeakable things to my bod, been married for almost 9 years and have little time to dedicate to myself or personal grooming. I still have it.
How do I know this? Well, my supermarket tells me so.

Let me start at the beginning, ever since we moved to NH from NJ in February I noticed a strange phenomenon: people are always staring at me. After the first week here I asked E if he had the same thing happen to him, he agreed: New Englanders were starers.
I decided that when people stared at me in the grocery store it was because they haven't seen someone so lovely in so long.
That is my reason and I am sticking to it.

Then just yesterday at the checkout line the bagger in my line who was in his early 20s, decided to make small talk.
I was SO on to him.

Him: So, how is the weather out there?
Implied Sexual undertone: I want to get hot and steamy with you

Him: Wow, 3 kids?
Implied Sexual Undertone: I'll still bang you

Him: Do you want your milk in a bag?
Implied Sexual Undertone: Too many things to even type. I mean really!


It is getting to the point where I can't even leave the house with no makeup, 3 kids, and dark circles under my eyes anymore!
I won't even get into the free cheese my octogenarian deli counter man.

School Time

I have been preparing for sending my kids back to school. I can't believe the summer is almost over! I have mixed feelings about school this year, it will be their first time in school all day.
K and I will miss them.

In preparation I got to try out some new snacks from Lance. They are perfect for school lunches or park trips and my kids love them.
Would you do me a favor and go on over to my other site and leave me a comment? I will return the favor.

After I am done crying about my babies growing up so fast.

Tapinoma Sessile

We have a little problem here in our house in the big woods of New Hampshire- ants. Not the cute, cuddly little ants you see on the sidewalk, or even the smart cool ants from the movies.
These are huge, black, ugly ants. They grow them big here in New England. Bugs that is.
I know what you are saying to yourself "Tuesday Girl, why do you have to bring color into this?" and my response is "because it is my blog and I would hate them the same as if they were white ants, or ants wearing tiny yarmulkes, and I am an equal opportunist hater. Of all bugs that enter my home. Call the Rev. Al of the insect world if you must".

Ahem.

So these big ants were everywhere in my house and at first it was mearly annoying but quickly progressed to total gross out.
Plus I was using all of my precious tissues* to kill them with the enormous strength of my hand. The squash is so satisfying, I love knowing a trespasser learned his lesson.
I only wish I could leave a picture of his dead corpse with a teeny little newspaper by it on my front steps to warn the others of what lies ahead dare they enter my home.

I almost second guessed myself when I saw a ant carrying a fallen brother- one of his comrades if you will, back to their fortress of evil doings. I hesitated, maybe if I let this one live the others would rally around the corpse screaming "WHY? WHY him? He was a good soldier". They would learn their lesson, go about evil in someone else's yard and all would be right with the world.
Instead I just squashed him with my tissue and went out to buy ant traps.

I mean there is only so much compassion I can give something less then 2 inches long.

Just ask that guy I dated in 1992.



* I personally keep kleenex in business. I love tissues and blow my nose probably 20-25 times a day.

The Rhythm Is Gonna Get You

So.
What are we all thinking about birth control? Good? Sucks?

After we had baby K, I was a weepy-wanting-more-babies mess (sappy post on that to follow shortly). Having another baby was/is not an option, we are not financially stable. So we did what every other under insured adult and/or teenager would do when still wanting to get bizzay but not wanting to pay for birth control: we use the rhythm method.

Sure we could have spared a few dollars for some condoms and I could have sent E to buy them because I still think the checkout girl is laughing at me and god forbid it is a grandma-type lady I may die.
Also, I hate my vagina smelling like gross prophylactics for 12-18 hours, call me crazy.
The pill? Been there done that. The patch made my skin break out.
Kinda hate all the other options and I repeat: we have no insurance right now, so that leaves us with the rhythm.

We are the rhythm nation.

Of course the one person who should not take risks or pregnancy chances is moi since I am pretty darn fertile and tend to drop more than one egg a month and some of my eggs occasionally split.
This game of chicken is better left unplayed, but still we play it one hand at a time, for 14 months now.
Sooner or later that bus is going to catch up with us and run us right over.
Splat.

Good thing E got a job with benefits. First thing on my list to do: call for a vasectomy appointment. It is his turn to have someone shove sharp pointy things in his junk. It is time for various exams of his private parts and if I could arrange a visiting school of med students to watch I sure would.
**********

Me: "I am writing about doing it with you on my blog today"

E: weird scrunched up face

Me: "well, not about doing it about our lack of birth control"

E: "Can I get some props about my performance in bed?"

Me: weird scrunched up face

E: "C'MON!!"

Me: "Only if I can live blog your vasectomy"

E: "NO!"

Me: "Fine, I will live tweet it. It is a beneficially health lesson. Kids need to know! IT'S FOR THE KIDS FOR CHRISTSAKES!"

E: "N O"

Me: "with pictures!"

E: storms out of room


I am soo live blogging that shit.