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I still got it.
Even after having 3 kids who did unspeakable things to my bod, been married for almost 9 years and have little time to dedicate to myself or personal grooming. I still have it.
How do I know this? Well, my supermarket tells me so.
Let me start at the beginning, ever since we moved to NH from NJ in February I noticed a strange phenomenon: people are always staring at me. After the first week here I asked E if he had the same thing happen to him, he agreed: New Englanders were starers.
I decided that when people stared at me in the grocery store it was because they haven't seen someone so lovely in so long.
That is my reason and I am sticking to it.
Then just yesterday at the checkout line the bagger in my line who was in his early 20s, decided to make small talk.
I was SO on to him.
Him: So, how is the weather out there?
Implied Sexual undertone: I want to get hot and steamy with you
Him: Wow, 3 kids?
Implied Sexual Undertone: I'll still bang you
Him: Do you want your milk in a bag?
Implied Sexual Undertone: Too many things to even type. I mean really!
It is getting to the point where I can't even leave the house with no makeup, 3 kids, and dark circles under my eyes anymore!
I won't even get into the free cheese my octogenarian deli counter man.
1 week ago
9 comments:
That is hilarious! I love reading your blog...I know it will put a smile on my face even with 2 screaming kids in the background!
Thank you Jodi, I needed that today!
Damn, I'm moving to NH if I can get those types of comments!
Jodi. You've still got it, fo sho! Lets start a free blog where people can donate money to us so we can purchase our dream domain names and see our ideas "flourish" ;-) I think ppl would do it lol. K bye :)
Dang it, your name isn't Jodi. You've got me all confused! lol.
Maybe you should stop wearing your bra on the outside. Cheers! K.
What until the old man at the deli offers you a chunk of his bologna. That seems to happen every time I'm at Target, and I was thinking it was because I apparently look like a woman who enjoys the random chunk of actual bologna, but now that I read this I'm think I'm go with your plan!
I AM DYING. HAHAHAHAHAHAHA. That is awesome!!!
Oh my gosh, too funny!
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