Monday, February 01, 2010

February

February is like a month chock full of Mondays. I hate it. Last year we moved to NH and left family and friends and maybe even hope behind in NJ. Six years ago my father died. This month, this year we are asking our kids to leave their friends once again and we are moving back to NJ. February is the time of year where I get sick of winter wish for a spring flower to bloom.
Just one.
So yeah, I am not a fan.

I told my husband once February sucks so bad they didn't even give it a full 30 days.

I sit here on the brink of this new month, this new February and I decided the month sucks because I let it. I have the power over my feeling and I can make the best of it or wallow in the terribleness of my memories.
E tells me I don't live in the moment enough, that I am not in "the now".
I completely agree with him.

This month, this year, this life in fact I have decided not to celebrate the deaths, or the failures. I am going to fight back against the demons.
This February I am going to see where life takes me, I am going to embrace change instead of fighting it.
This month I am going to stare out at my snow covered lawn and think of the bright flowers just waiting to bloom under the warm sun.

I can almost smell them already.

4 comments:

  1. February is hard for me, too. I love the cold weather, but start craving gardening and farmer's markets and such. It won't be long!

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  2. Keep your head up. Spring is coming soon! Know this kids. Move easier than you think
    I know I survived it. In the middle of 4th grade. I will say a prayer for some warm sunny days to cheer you up.

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  3. My hubs and I got married on Feb. 5 - you can celebrate that for February!

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  4. My birthday is at the end of February, but for the last couple of years I've really been miserable all month long. I finally decided that, even though I live in California, I don't spend enough time outside during the winter, and by February I'm just done with the lack of sunlight.

    This year, I resolved to make it different by filling up my social calendar with all sorts of fun things. It's only the third, but already, this is the BEST FEBRUARY EVER.

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