When we went back to New Jersey last weekend we were in our driveway putting our boxes of junk into the trailer. I noticed my old friends passed by on the sidewalk in front of our house.
They were my LDS friends that visited me every so often on a Saturday so they could save my soul.
I was always nice to them, I can imagine people's reactions to them on their doorstep. People probably slammed their door in their faces every day.
Pamphlets with Jesus' face on the cover scattered in the streets sometimes, leftovers from when people didn't open their doors to them.
I was fascinated. Mormons/LDS is intriguing to me, I assume because there are few Mormon churches in NJ coupled with my adoration for the show Big Love (how great is Big Love?).
Truth is, I don't think I believe in religion anymore. What little faith I did have was lost when my father died.
I don't want to go to church, I don't want to pray to someone only when my times are tough and I don't want to be a hypocrite to my children.
The last time I saw my visitors I explained that I was moving in a couple of weeks. They wished me well and went on their way. In some way I wished I had more time with them. I do not want to become a Mormon, or a Buddhist or a baptist for that matter, I just wanted to understand how they could be so devoted.
How they could wrap their minds around the tragedies all around us, every single day and still believe.
I want to know why they care enough to walk around the streets in the winter to knock on people's doors to try and save a perfect strangers soul.
I want to ask them just what is so great about religion anyway? Religion is the cause of wars!
I will miss my weekend visits with my Mormon friends.
Or maybe, just maybe, I just wanted to be saved.
3 months ago