Tuesday, January 15, 2008

Life Can Be So Cruel

I really have never been more stressed out in my life. E has still not had any job offers, he has some more interviews lined up but it is hard to keep up faith and hope every week. Week after week it is more bad news. How much more can a family take?
It seems like when it rains it pours and financially we are in the middle of a typhoon.

I find myself wishing I wasn't pregnant so I could go back to work full time and pick up where I am needed. The baby is due in such a short time and I am scared.
So very scared.

We need a small miracle here and E is out right now trying to make sure we have some security. This mostly falls onto his shoulders and I think he may break soon, if his mood and demeanor last night is any sign, he will be breaking soon. I am not sure I could pick up the pieces.
We are not bad people. We work hard, we are raising good kids, we are just struggling to make it like everyone else. We don't vacation, we don't live lavishly, we do without for our kids.
I feel so badly for him because he feel like a failure and so do I. We are failures.

Is there any millionaires out there that want to adopt my family for a small amount of time??


  1. I am so sorry for your struggles. And the timing, it couldn't be harder on the both of you.

    Being pg does make you feel restrictive in many ways, including wanting to take part in saving your family. You are doing everything you can do, by keeping that baby healthy.
    Just try to focus on what you can change and hopefully, the rest will fall into place ASAP!!!

  2. I feel your pain and share in your struggles. It's been a rocky roller-coaster since June here, with my losing my job, then my hubby getting hurt, then him losing his job, and oh...it just goes on and on. He lost his job a few weeks before Christmas and we haven't yet recovered. Hang in there. Better times are ahead.

  3. first of all,,,you're NOT failures. everyone hits hard times every now and then, and I guess this is your time. Now, I know that doesn't make you feel any better about the whole situation....sorry...I wish there was something I could do. Esp. with a new baby on the way.

    Some day, you'll look back on this time, and say,
    "Honey, remember when we ate ramen noodles every night for supper?"

    here's hoping for a job!!!

  4. Oh man, I feel you, I really do. You are absolutely not failures, just people, and everyone goes through tough crap, unfortunately more often than not. Look at me, I live with my husband AND child at my mom's house. That's a real morale booster every day, "Yes, we could not afford to live in our own place with a child so we are mooching off of mom for awhile." We are hoping to be able to buy a house in the near future but it's very, very tough. Keep your head up, you have a beautiful baby on the way and things always tend to look their worst just before they start to pick up :)

  5. Shitty things happen to good people all the time. Too damn often and I see it every single day. You didn't do anything as a person, or couple, or family to bring this about. It just did and it sucks that it fell on you, especially now.

    It will work out. I know it will even if it won't be as quickly as you had hoped.

  6. Oh how I wish I was a millionaire! I would adopt you in hot minute. I hope things get better soon.

  7. Anonymous1:34 PM

    It is SO hard. I've been there.

    I wish I could help you, for sure. And I agree with others - you are NOT failures. I'll keep you in my thoughts and prayers. I KNOW the right job will turn up soon. I feel it. Just take things a moment at a time until then.


  8. I am so sorry, and know you have to be so stressed right now. I also know that telling you not to worry will not do anything to help.
    The timing here is so rotten, but I'm sure your husband will find a job soon. I'll be praying for you.

  9. I hope things start looking up soon. Please don't feel like a failure, though. You have a lot to feel good about especially during this rough time.

  10. I'm so sorry, hon. XO

  11. Anonymous3:35 PM

    You're not a failure just because life hit you with a major blow. We've gotten hit with so much shit over the past couple years that we've just become numb to it. I hope things work out. :-/


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