Monday, June 04, 2007

Baseball

Things I was thinking (what I am always thinking) while watching the Yankee/Red Sox games this weekend:

Who has that much spit? Seriously, how do you produce that much saliva?

Their uniforms look so clean, does someone have to wash and press them for each game or do they get a new uniform for each game? I really wonder about that because a new uniform for each game is so wasteful.

If there was a rule that you cannot take 39 minutes between each attempt at hitting the ball maybe more girls would watch. You should not be allowed to step away from the plate and adjust your gloves or your hat or whatever, just swing the damn bat.

Many of these players look very dirty. Clean yourself up for god sake!

Gosh, I so wish I had a hot dog from Yankee stadium right now!

7 comments:

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  2. Very Funny! I will not watch any sport where the participants can eat and use tobacco while they play!! It just seems counter-intuitive.

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  3. You didn't mention the 8 minutes they waste adjusting their crotchal regions :)

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  4. I hate baseball. And football, basketball, golf, soccer, tennis...

    But, nothing beats a ballpark hotdog!

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  5. I never understood the spitting either. Seems kinda gross LOL.

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  6. These guys used to chew tobacco, which usually involved a golf ball-sized wad of tobacco being perpetually stuffed into one cheek or the other for the whole game. If you ever tried swallowing the saliva after it has mixed with that "chaw", you'd understand why they spit constantly. It burns all the way down and stays burning for some time afterwards.

    These days, the spitters will use one of a couple of things... some use the newer "smokeless" tobacco products that come in a small tin and involve the proverbial "pinch between the cheek and gum", while others - especially the managers and others who watch from the dugout - will chew and spit either sunflower or pumpkin seeds.

    No matter how you cut it, I agree it's pretty disgusting. I'm not sure how many of the gum chewers are perpetual spitters, but I imagine those who expectorate most prolifically aren't chewing gum, but either have some smokeless tobacco going on or are spitting those sunflower seeds.

    The seeds are especially gross when pieces of them get stuck in the spittle residue on their chin, or in facial hair, btw.

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  7. I won't watch a whole game anymore. But football peeves me off even more, like when they have three minutes left on the clock but it takes forty five minutes to actually finish...ugh.

    Yanks better keep their game up, all those games they had lost early in the season had me so pissed...and I live around Sox fans, I hate to see them so happy.

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