Wednesday, June 14, 2006

Open Letters

Open letter to the bitch in the pediatrician's office:

Dear Bitch,

When a person walks into a room and smiles at your cute year old daughter and then smiles at you, how about smiling back? Instead you had a scowl on your face like my kids had polio.
Perhaps you are one of those mothers that only likes their child and hates all other kids? That will be great, then your child will have no playmates.

Also, when the nurse asked why I was there & I explained that my son had bug bites on his legs that he scratched and I wanted to make sure he didn't infect them, don't look like at him like he actually was spraying a disease all over your kid. He was sitting on a chair looking at a book like a good boy.
He had bug bites. Just like the chiggers that crawled up your butt.
Fuck you and your smug attitude. I am sorry that you have the body of a 14 year old boy, maybe a positive attitude and growing your hair longer then 3 inches would help.

Sincerely sorry for the man you are married to,
Tuesday



Dear Random Strange Lady at Target,

When you are in the process of checking out, it is not the best time to answer your cell phone. You did though and then proceeded to SCREAM into the phone that you do not have reception and then for some reason yell "Pagoda" "Pagoda" "PA GOTA" " PAAA GOOO TAAA" "PAGOTA".

Perhaps if you don't have cell service, you can make the call at a later time when youhave better reception, instead of screaming in the middle of the store.
What was also strange was that you were just standing there, even after all my items were rung up and you blocked the credit card device. I just had to stand there and wait until your scream fest was finished. Perhaps next time you are at Target, you can buy a clue that there are other people around you.
There are other people that exist. Gasp!

I did feel bad about cursing you out in my head because as a afterthought I realized you might have been mentally challenged.
Then I realized you were just socially challenged and didn't want to do anything for anyone, including having some common courtesy.

Fuck you and your pagoda,
Tuesday

4 comments:

  1. LOL! I have wanted to send people letters like this!
    I especially haaaaaaate women like the one in the ped.'s office. Stupid Bitch. *shaking my head in disgust*

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  2. LMFAO... Yeah, I could write tons of letters like this too - I hate people...

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  3. Oh, I LOVE IT! There should be a government sanctioned PO box specifically for letters like that.

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  4. Thanks for the laugh!!

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