Posts
Dear strange man in random stores:
Yes, I know my daughter is cute, adorable in fact, but do not touch her. I know you are probably a nice man, maybe even a lonely, widowed Grandfather, but it creeps me out to no end. Do not touch her. You are lucky I didn't bite off your hand, and if my husband was there, he would have bit your head off.
Hand to yourself people.
Love, Tuesday
Dear period,
E-fucking-nough already. Don't come 8 days late, stronger then ever, more cramps then ever then disappear for 36 hours and try and come back. You had your chance. I am not going to play peek a boo with you. Come all out or hang out until next month, it is your choice.
Fuck you,
Tuesday
Dear lent,
I didn't give up anything for you. Last year I gave up my thyroid, I figure that will even me up for a few years at least. Plus, what have you done for me lately?
Sorry, but I even ate turkey on Friday.
Love, Tuesday
Dear readers,
Whirlpool or Fridgidaire?
Love, Tuesday
7 years ago
Kenmore :) Sorry I am just messing with you- kinda fun at the moment. You are too funny you know that.
ReplyDeleteGMC!
ReplyDeleteOh, wait, they make cars...
As for your first letter, totally understandable. Is it strange that I get freaked out even when some women try to touch my son. I don't know why...
p.s I don't have a dishwasher so I can't vote! (well, I do...her name is DIANA!!!)
ReplyDeleteI have a GE Profile. So, I don't have an opinion on either of the one's you mentioned.
ReplyDeleteTHis post cracked me up, btw!
Whirlpool
ReplyDeleteWhirlpool.
ReplyDeleteAt nearly 40 I can't wait till my period stops(already into menopause) and I'm counting the months! As for the "nice old man", wait till your daughter is 13-14...now those "nice old men" seem like pedophiles who all seem to lurk about in the cleaning isles at Target.
ReplyDeletegreat letters. Dont do whirlpool. You know why. lol
ReplyDelete