Tuesday, June 29, 2004

Videos

I hear that the Paris sex tape is now out in stores. It is about a young girl trying to make it in the big city starring Paris Hilton and Rick Soloman's penis. I did see a portion of it on the internet, but I would never watch it with Rick's commentary. Who cares about him?
Now there is a new sex video with Jenna, the annoying chick from Survivor. Who cares about her having sex? She is quoted as being "very concerned" about the video being out on the internet, but relax chicky nobody wants to see it.
I have never taped myself, nor will I in the future, because I would never want that to happen to me. Like I need a teacher having seen it & me having to go to back to school night. Like I need another reason for strange men to ogle my cleavage.

That brings me to another topic. I have been reading a ton of blogs lately and there seems to be a large portion of men talking about how they masturbate in the shower. Is this something new or has this been going on all along? If it has I need to get better bathroom cleaner. Like I need to soak in your fluids while I am trying to clean myself.
Maybe it is just married men who feel the need to scamper off to please themselves, so their wives don't feel like they are neglecting their man's needs. We all have needs but please, just remember to clean up after yourself dammit!

9 comments:

  1. In regards to your comment: "Is [masturbating in the shower] something new or has this been going on all along? If it has I need to get better bathroom cleaner. Like I need to soak in your fluids while I am trying to clean myself."

    You know, this is one of those hypocrisies that women have. When a man goes down on you he gets your juices all over the lower part of his face (at least, if he's doing things right) and you rarely hear a man complaining that a woman's bodily fluids are disgusting or repulsive. Then, you've got women who tend to think that semen is some sort of flesh eating goo that can ruin bed sheets and some how damage you if you soak in a bath tub that's been masturbated in.

    Do you ever consider how that makes a man feel? Do you ever think that your disgust with his fluids may be affecting his opinion of himself?

    When a guy cums in the shower (and heck yeah it's been going on for a long time. At least since I was in middle school) he's putting maybe a teaspoon or two of fluid into the water. Within seconds that fluid is down the drain. So, stop worrying about it and learn to be a little less critical about your man's semen.

    Oh, and sorry - I'm a little sensitive about this issue.

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  2. Hey listen, I have irrational fears of not cleaning my bathroom enough. It's not about whether it is a man or a woman. Check out my OCD post.
    Deep breath good husband.

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  3. I dont. Havent done that in years (bout nine years).

    Thing is, that stuff turns into glue in the shower. It just wont come off the tub, if you know what I mean. Scary.

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  4. Seriously it turns to glue? weird. I did not know that.

    Good husband: I for one will raise my hand with pride, I am not afraid of cum and I am not afraid to admit it. As long as it has no calories or carbs of course.

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  6. TG, I'm with ya. Like Murphy, I'm not afraid of a little man-made protein shake. But I am afraid of an icky bathroom. And FYI - the average ejaculate contains only 5-7 calories.

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  7. Only 5-7.... fucking awesome. I'm in full approval of cum, officially.

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  8. Yup, 5-7 calories, which leads me to believe there aren't many carbs either. A dieter's dream, really.

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  9. Perhaps we can market it as a new diet, like a South Beach or Atkins. We can call it the "Man Diet" or something to that affect but much, much funnier.

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